So I got this gig playing Persian techno music with this guy. That should be enough of a punch line, but on Saturday we played–excuse me, “played”–at the Pierce College Persian Peace Party or something. It was in the valley. I pretended to play an electronic drumset that wasn’t plugged in.

All this was in preparation for a November 26 show at the Kodak Theatre. Presumably, we’ll be playing live instruments for that one. Actually, the bass player we have is really, really good and I’m looking forward to playing with him some more.

So in the “green room,” which was really a white tent, there was this huge plate of whole Persian cucumbers just sitting there. And it dawned on me. That’s gonna be my stage name for all future Persian techno performances. Steve “The Persian Cucumber” Coy. I smell a Grammy! Wait, no. That’s just the cologne cloud from all the greased-up Persian dudes at the gig.